another reflective & random thought

It has been a long weekend. I took a vacation day on Friday because my little one graduated from Kindergarten. Ugh. My baby (forever) is no longer a baby. I cried  a few times thinking about how much she’s grown already and how life just seems to whiz by. It makes me feel sad. It makes me feel excited for the future. It makes me feel, well, Old! But whatevs. My babygirl is now enjoying her summer vacation and is well on her way to college!

The more I think about her life passing before my eyes, the more it stresses within me to be a better example of a woman to her. I want her to see in me a healthy, energetic, smart, sane (as long as she let’s me be), and spiritually grounded person. It’s a hard task. By no means do I ever have a perfect day at any of these qualities I yearn to poses. However, as I teach her, I learn that you take every situation as it comes to you. Honestly, that’s what I want her to grasp. Life happens. It doesn’t ask for permission. So you have to take everything it throws at you with grace, humility and mercy (for yourself, and if you can muster it, for others as well).

I think that’s why this “dieting thing” has stuck as long as it has. I have learned to master, for the most part, self mercy. It goes a long way. Trust me. When you learn to have mercy on yourself, you can repent faster. When you learn to have mercy on yourself, you can start over again the very next meal. When you have mercy on yourself, you can see why it’s so important to pass it on to others.


Thanks to that lesson learned, I am now down to 197.5 pounds. I’m hoping to be at 195 by the end of next week. I just have to survive another 3 day weekend. I am not yet prepared mentally to handle so much time at home, surrounded by all kinds of food, without having any activities planned. I told you the other day that I have a problem staying out of the kitchen when I’m bored….so I’m going to have to devise a plan this week before Memorial Day weekend catches me off guard! Any ideas?



sushi treat

Enjoying a lunch by myself of delicious sushi. Like anyone, when I first ate sushi I was scared and didn’t know what to expect. However, I was surprised and fell in major love with the delicacy.

Obviously, sushi is a healthy food choice on a diet. Of course, this is also avoiding fried, “crunchy”, mayo and cream cheese. I was afraid that maybe the rice would make it high in points, now that I’m on Weight Watchers. But thankfully my sushi faves (rainbow roll, salmon and avocado) are safe and decent on points! Remember that everything is in moderation, of course. Eating too much fish isn’t recommend. Also, sushi can get pretty expensive, fast!

I’ve been pretty happy so far on the PointsPlus plan. I was in great need of a change in diet. Like I say often, find those little things to keep you motivated. Weight Watchers has begun to help me, and now sushi is helping me stay motivated and satisfied! It sounds silly, but I’m trying to use it as a reward (or treat) for having a good week. So I work hard to earn it. Many fitness people say not to reward yourself with food, but I think it’s about finding the right reward and the correct intention. I may be rewarding myself with food, but it’s a healthy choice. The decision makes me feel good inside and out, and that connection is vital, when it comes to healthy living.

I hope you’ve had a good week! I’ll probably blog again this weekend and let you know how my 1st (ever) WW meeting went. Till then..

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I love R&B

I love the way R&B makes me feel when I listen to it. It makes my heart beat faster, it makes me think of sunny days and cool breezes. It even makes my eyes well up with tears sometimes.

R&B and Soul have definitely made a huge impression on my heart. R&B makes feel like a totally different person, maybe the realest part of me that’s been buried deep inside.

Really Soul music takes deep creativity, real musicianship, and a real voice. Though I love all kinds of music, R&B is on the highest pedestal for me. I see so much of myself in it’s melodic lullaby.

R&B reminds me of good old friends. R&B reminds me of a porch view, hardwood floors and BBQ. I could never let go of how it haunts me, stirs me, invites me in and charges me. I love R&B.

between sleep & awake: the soul

Ever wonder what’s up with the soul?

Why does it feel the need to be all or nothing?

I think for that precise reason it is called Soul. We try to fight it (I know I do), but we were made for commitment; mind, body and soul. That’s why our emotions are so torn when we fail to give ourselves completely to anything or anyone. The soul is crushed without the body because it’s too sensitive to carry the weight of the situation alone. The body cannot perform as needed without the commitment of the mind, that holds the key to our self-control. And the body will always suffer when it battles against the soul’s yearning to be better.We have to be wholly on the same page and step to accomplish any task successfully; Mind, Body and Soul.